It is now over a month since the New Year (only over a month I should say). Only a month and I have already broken every New Year's resolution I had made to myself. I am unfortunately unsurprised as this is not a new occurrence. In fact, I don’t think I can remember a single year where I have truly followed through on any of those promises. One promise I make nearly every year is that I will read the Bible more, spend more time in the Word, something I desperately want but never seem to consistently achieve.

Why do I keep doing this? Why at this point in my life have I not either followed through or stopped trying altogether? Well, because I know how powerful the Word can be, or rather God has shown me how powerful His word can be. I have felt the transformative and renewing power of the Word before and I long to feel it again. I mean, what better way to start a New Year than spiritual renewal and transformation right? I seem to constantly be in a cycle of renewal and spiritual fullness only to be brought back around to an almost nonchalant view of the Gospel. I am constantly in need of renewal because I constantly forget just how much our God loves us and is faithful to us.

Then what, I ask, am I to do? Well, I think the answer is nothing really, but just keep showing up and let the Word of God reveal Him to me. It is not in our power anyway, it is God who pursues us even when we are not faithful to Him. How then can I show up? Well, God has given us a community of other believers for a reason, so I say start by showing up with them: to Sunday morning services, to our city groups, and Bible studies.

I cannot tell you how many times I have wanted to not show up on a Sunday morning or to our city group on Wednesday night, but then I am always so glad when I went. These are times God uses to renew us, often just by showing up and being in the Word with other believers. I mean, really, how easy is that?! Not to say I’m perfect. For example, I don’t think I have made it to a single Bible study this season, but when it’s as easy as just showing up, what truly is my excuse? Personally, my “excuse” is that I am a person often crippled by what I perceive as failures. If I “fail” in some way, I become paralyzed by the what-if’s and the guilt, unable to move forward or backward, until I either snap out of it or ignore it enough that I can move on.

Thankfully, however, I showed up to a Sunday morning service recently where Pastor Justin spoke the words: “Never stop starting,” and I am really trying (and often failing) to apply that throughout my life. This is the message of the Gospel: through Jesus we are always given a fresh start. He is there to cover our sins and our failures so we are free to “never stop starting,” to never stop being renewed, we're allowed to fail.

When the Israelites finally gathered after many years to hear the Word spoken by Ezra, many of them began to weep. We can surmise that this was likely due to conviction of their sin or maybe from regret for how long it had been since they had lived as children of God. However, they were told to “stop crying,” and to instead “feast and celebrate.” We should not beat ourselves up over failures, because we can instead have joy that those failures have been covered by the blood of Christ, and that we are loved by a God who does not forsake us even when we forsake Him.

~Rachel Whippo